3 Kuntum Puisi: ‘Dreams’, ‘Secrets’ Dan ‘Kepedihan Itu’

Dreams
 
If dreams were like pieces of pebbles on the shore
I would have picked them up & show you
how beautiful they would be in my hands.
But like pebbles washed by the tides
my dreams drifted from shore to shore
lost their pebbly shapes & sometimes break
in the midst of the ocean.

If dreams were like pieces of pebbles on the shore
collect them one by one while you still can
till the tides take them away from you.
And if on some distant shore
you stumble upon a pebble of my dream
try to pick it up & imagine it’ll say:
‘Thanks for believing in mine.’

Written: 29 May 1978
Lorong L, Telok Kurau Road, Singapore
Published: Waves, University of Singapore Arts & Social Science Club Magazine, June 1978
By: Rasiah Halil.

Secrets
 
Burdened by secrets
are seeds of
hopes
dreams
tears
that you will behold
in voices unknown:
Palembang
Srivijaya
Singapura
Majapahit
Melaka
Brunei
Aceh
Hindia Timur*
Malaya
where secrets are confided
in codes
in proverbs & pantuns*
adat laws & wayang kulit*
sufi poets & esoteric knowledge
& the artistic traveller
traversing the Archipelago
encoding secrets
in poems.

Many are our secrets here
& not just in spices
batik sarongs
or exotic species
ask Ibn Battuta
I-Tsing
Magellan
D’Albuquerque
de Houtman
Raffles
& you will know
the secrets
of the Malay Archipelago.

*Hindia Timur: Indonesia, a term given to Indonesia by the Dutch.
*Pantun: traditional Malay poetry, usually in quatrains.
* Adat laws: customary laws of the Malays.
* Wayang Kulit: shadow play, a type of traditional theatre of the Malay Archipelago.

Written: 10 November 1995
Mayflower, Iowa City, United States of America
Published: 100 Words, University of Iowa, 1996
By: Rasiah Halil.

Kepedihan Itu

Telah kudengar kepedihan itu,
berbisik dalam sendu, tika langit
semakin gelap, & insan-insan terlelap,
siapalah sangka, fajar yang menjelma
adalah kazab, bukan subuh nan cerah,
& kita terluka, oleh permainan alam & warna.

Aku tahu derita ini, yang tiada siapa
mempeduli, sekadar disulap permukaan
mimpi, mengejar segalanya, asal berjaya,
atau dianggap telah tiba, walau yang digadai
adalah maruah, harga diri, & nama.

Langit ini pasti cerah, itu aku tetap percaya,
betapa gelap pun malam memekat, & bayang
-bayang merasuki, menghantui kita, berapa
lamakah kegelapan ini berlarut, sedang subuh
menanti di hujung embun, & mentari sesekali
menjenguk, di balik tirai yang kian tertutup?

Laungkan sekuat hati, hanya untuk berkata:
kita masih ada, walau digilis luka, didarahi
peristiwa, semangat itu akan terjelma jua,
tanpa halilintar, fatamorgana, sekadar bianglala,
hadir, sesudah hujan lebat ini reda.

Telanlah hempedu sepi, untuk ketahanan
menjejak ranjau duri, hiruplah tenaga yakin,
untuk dinafasi kesegaran tulen, melangkah
tanpa berpaling, dengan tabah, reda,
kerana betapa pun ego-ego itu membesar,
di paksi yang sama kita berpusar.

Sebutir zarah
apalah kita
dalam semberani tarikan semesta
betapa sepi pun derita
betapa pedih pun sengsara
hanyalah seketika
seperti iri & dendam
fitnah & keangkuhan
akhirnya terkandas di Lubang Gelap
tak berbekas
di maya pada Allah yang Maha Luas.

Ditulis: 8 – 9 Ogos 2003
Bedok, Singapura
Tersiar: Berita Minggu, Singapura
Tulisan: Rasiah Halil.

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